The dominant elements for me are yellow sunflowers, blue sky, my eye in the center, which already suggests that I have such peace and hope that this life is somehow relatively organized, and simultaneously around my eye there are photos of parts of my sleeping son's face. There are also hedgehogs here. Hedgehogs symbolize my wife. And that they are in sum the meaning of my life too. I'm sometimes even afraid of conversations about some divorce [necessary for further legal transition], because I wouldn't want to lose any of these living people here for myself, because I believe I simply live for others. For myself I wouldn't have lived long ago, because actually, if not for my son, I probably wouldn't be here anymore, because... sometimes I get upset, that I even talked about this with a psychologist... Actually sometimes I feel like a hostage to the fact that there's a son. So I'd probably already be after a successful suicide."