Estonia
Bill
A gay man, age 52
Photo: Alana Proosa
Bill told:
In general, life has been kind to me – I don’t have periods that I would strike out. So I brought something with a bit of a trick: this ring is two-in-one. I’ve been together with my partner for 25 years. It’s the second ring we gave each other since the first one wore out over time. But now I’d like to get rid of this one. I don’t mean to leave my husband, but that he would indeed replace it with a wedding ring. I don’t have an engagement ring, since I proposed him, but I had one for him which he is wearing now, while I still have this old one.
I don’t know about other couples, but in some matters we are very similar, in others different, and in terms of fighting for gay rights, he is mostly rather opposed to it. So his first reaction to marriage equality was reluctant: “What’s wrong with us – why would we need to be recognised on the state level?” For me, on the other hand, it is very important. First of all, we are already in this age, when you never know what can happen, all our friends and families know about our relationship, and you’d think there would be no problems. But we have an apartment and a summer house that we co-own. So we would need wills. And to me, it is important to be accepted by the state. My parents were married until death, both my sisters are married. Marriage is an inherent part of our family traditions.
So we make compromises – sometimes he, sometimes me. I pulled together a lot of energy and time to propose him, yet to be prepared to a no, so I was very happy that he said yes. We don’t have a date yet, but I have a steady hope we are making it official and I’ll get a new ring. I like this one, too, but I just want a wedding ring to replace it.
About the project in Estonia
Artist Alana Proosa photographed objects brought by the participants. These objects symbolised something to leave behind and something to bring to the future. These objects are accompanied by accounts told by the interviewees.
